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Take A Moment for Yourself!

This post is in collaboration with TIAA to empower women experiencing divorce, encouraging them to take control of their financial future.

Working with the TIAA has had me reflecting on my life and decisions I’ve made. I wish I could go back to my younger self and say “save your money, you don’t need anyone's permission and most of all never doubt yourself.” I want to tell every young woman out there, that you are enough and to go after your dreams. I’d say live by these words:

Let go of the hurt an anger. When we love and or trust someone, our feelings are exposed which in turn it makes you weak and vulnerable so your ego gets bruised and battered. Instead of holding onto the anger and hate, release. Learn to forgive, even if it’s not asked for, do it for your sanity. You need to move on and let go.

Woo yourself, meaning do something to nourish your soul. Take a weekend class, learn a language, take a pilates class, pick up an instrument, do what I did – learn how to sail. Your personal happiness comes from you, it has to come from you first in order to accept the love and respect that you deserve.

Don’t compare yourself to anyone, EVER! Remember a rose doesn’t compare itself to another rose, instead it blooms beautifully without a care in the world. Be a rose, stand proud, stand tall and blossom.

Find three friends that have your back, your friends will be the pillar holding up your house. The people you choose to surround yourself with your day-to-day life should clap when you succeed. They should be sharp-witted, smart and witty.

Stay healthy, work out and eat healthy. Find a sitting area to meditate, sit in the sun feeling the warmth all over your body, read a book, keep up with politics, form an opinion, find inner peace.

Travel, even if you don’t have the money. Find the cheapest flight to where you want to go and then wander. Wake up knowing that you don’t have to be anywhere and wherever you end up, you’ll be learning and exploring.

We only accept the love we think we deserve. You deserve someone who doesn’t judge you, who will assure you, make you feel like the star that you are. You deserve to be someone’s first priority.

Good chances are that if you learn this while you’re younger and practice it daily you’ll find that you won’t settle and your path will be clear. I have learned this and after forty-something years, I’ve decided to follow my dreams. Having a child that is my greatest accomplishment, starting my podcast to help others going through divorce and or separation, it’s important for me to know and help others that you are not alone, you have someone to talk to, I’m here. There’s more to come and it’s only getting better.

You can learn more about what I’d tell my younger self about getting divorced and get financial help from TIAA.

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